Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
Idk. We dropped acid and Kevin ran away again. We didn't find him for like 3 hours.
Man I wish I had been there
Yah we found him in the pool shed of some elderly couple. They were on the porch watching all of the shenanigans. ...To be young again.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
Played "Which Couple Will Take Me Home Tonight" at the bar last night... I can now cross three-some off my bucket list
Okay I woke up in my room, snuggie on, had a water bottle in my hand my tv was on Disney channel and my cigarettes are gone. And I deleted every text in my phone but one that said 'you are absolutely welcome'
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Two questions for you. Did I throw up last night and did we get food or did I dream that..?
No you never threw up but you did force me to take you to wendy's because you wanted "beef and ketchup"
One good thing out of all this is her ass is huge. Like Australia Big.
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
Randomize
