you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I have now hooked up with 8 of the Apostles. I have no idea where I'm going to find a guy named Bartholomew.
in my lab write-up should i mention that i watered my plant with tequila?
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
maybe volvos are so family friendly and safe because they're extremely uncomfortable to get fucked on.
Just once I'd like to throw a party where I don't have to clean up someone else's blood the next morning.
We never did figure out who the stuff on the wall came from, did we?
Ecstasy should be its own food group.
You would think the bank would reward me for getting my account down to 3 cents without overdrafting it.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Pants are for mortals
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
I think that maybe Alyssa may of had too much to drink. is it normal for her to straddle random people in quizno's?
Randomize
