Manager just farted into the intercom. Whole place heard it. A number of people stopped everything and looked at him. Best. Night. Ever.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
She was giving you that "I really want to blow you but I have to act professional" look. Guaranteed
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
You look me right in the eyes and yelled "By the power of the superglue beer sword, I designate you my driver!" I almost felt honored.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
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