these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
He was in me and said I can't believe this happened because of facebook. MOOD KILLER.
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
I took my shirt off and stood in the kitchen for an hour and a half talking to his parents about my tattoos
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
So I stappled myself into my toga... that should be interesting getting out of later tonight...
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
I just remembered that you tried to trade me for a glass of wine
Stocking up on Wasabi powder. Nobody's tampons are safe.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Randomize