We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
he wanted to give me a nickname... my choices were superjugs,godzilla boobs or mouth of fury
I lost of the blow last night. Found it later in my bag labeled Fairy Dust.
the girl next to me in class just threw up in a waterbottle during our exam.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
He was dressed as ron burgundy and his pickup line was "dont worry, i wont make you jump in a bear pit."
...I think i just fell in love with a random undergrad at first glance. He was the awkward young adult version of captain hook. Dear god i need to get off this campus.
I wouldn't be too worried. He's been known to chase a chubby before.
THAT IS NOT HOW YOU TALK TO YOUR SISTER
I DID MY EXPERIMENTING. FOUR YEARS OF IT. IN HIGH SCHOOL.
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
Does this mean I have to put a bra on now
Woke up this morning to a bunch of snapchats of you drunkenly yelling at grasshoppers. Good night?
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Randomize