Whatever. They have the same name, so it's not even cheating. It's brand loyalty.
nothing i could have done in life could have prepared me for walking in on her SHITTING on my rug.
Needless to say there is no second date for this girl.
yet...
I drunk wandered into my parents bed and slept between them
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
I mean I want to be happy but it's a train wreck that you can't look away from
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
Floor bacon is actually really good
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
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