talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Wow.. I was doing a mental check of my bank balance & I literally just said to myself: 'I have 27 dollars and a bottle of tequila til tuesday-ill be fine'
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
just wrote a 6 page paper on my blackberry. including 3 sources. college is teaching me good things so far.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
My worst case scenario tonight is that I fuck a hot Swiss girl. Let that give you perspective on my life at the moment.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Listening to Ke$ha's new single to pump myself up for my STD test.
Did he ask you why you were in his back yard Sunday night?
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
Are you coming to class or was the dick pic this morning your way of saying not today?
I didn't think four grown drunk men could cuddle on a twin size bed, but we found a way.
I feel sorry for the person who's phone number is 704-1776 cause from now on I'm giving that number to every guy I never wanna talk to again. Happy Independence Day
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Randomize