This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
She was eating leaves off of trees and saying it was salad, and even told a guy in passing that her favorite color was plaid.
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
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