If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
i took my goldfish out of his bowl last night and put him in my bed
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
I hope this doesn't change things. I feel that me being a minor made it more exciting.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
PLEASE DON'T BE HEARTLESS COME AND GET ME FROM THE BAR I'M HIGH AS SHIT AND I LOST MY SHOES
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
You know what a wolf looks like when it kills a small animal? How it shakes it around in it's mouth? I did that to a bag of Taco Bell last night
I'm going to a one year olds birthday party to smoke weed. What has my life become.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Randomize
