just caught my little brother jacking off the family pet
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
just woke up with a thong on my face, dont remember going home with anyone and its way too big for it to be a good thing
I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
The KFC double down is way too much for a drunk. He was just staring at it in awe.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
I am more familiar with your toilet than I ever want to be with any appliance
I'm not asking you to commit. I'm politely asking your penis to be my friend.
Sorry I need more motivation then McDonalds and mojitos.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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