Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
I'm too high to be shopping. I just contemplated deoderant for fifteen minutes. Now testing pillows
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
I'm listening to bach and watching porn,is that a sign of depression?
Quite the contrary. Sophistication.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I took shrooms last night.. For a good half hour I genuinely believed I was black and being held captive by a leaf. Never again.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
Basically I think I'm replacing men/sex with theme parks.
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
I seriously just forgot to push down the toaster twice in a row \n\nSo I've been waiting 8 minutes for toaster strudels that I haven't even started... Too high
Randomize
