It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
You would think that someone would have been sober enough to object to vodka bong races.
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
I'm spooning a three legged dog right now. Started drinking whiskey with Breakfast. Best part about being biracial is Irish cousins. Dog Pic Attahed
She answered the door wearing a blanket and holding a golf club. I was too late for this party.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
you walked onto the street in the middle of the 10K in your thong. it was a whole new kind of expirience.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
It's been three years since Kelly shit in the to go box that we put in Sam's mailbox after we broke up. Considering Sam and I are friends again, should I finally tell him?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
Randomize
