I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
hahaha our party bus just died on the freeway and we're drinking in the center divider. i'm on the roof. i win
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
Hey wes just called me saying he was asleep outside by the pond at my apt complex
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
You almost hooked up with 200lb woman in her mid-forties, because you were convinced she was adele. Your drinking problem is officially out of control.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
I know you're very busy with sleep and things, but when you wake up we need to talk about weirdly shaped penises.
I just got high and swiffered the bathroom floor....2 for 2 on brilliant life ideas
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Of course I'm watching space shows while stoned on the science channel. Why would I want to learn while not baked out of my skull?
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Put viagra in his coffee. I did that with Geoff last month and three hours later I had bitten through a throw pillow and gotten a noise complaint from a neighbor
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