I just woke up surrounded in unopened snacks
Dual, econ, hell, shiv, aunt, puppy. 1 out of 6. T9 word needs to learn how to cuss like me.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
I hate drunken dyslexia, i thought she said "someone to do" not "something to do" long story short i now have a restraining order.
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Like I said I'm looking on the bright side. The bright side just happens to be filled with penis attached to hot marines
Please tell me that's his leg and you didn't really just send me a picture of your dog's dick
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
She waited 7 months to break out her comicon costumes. I was only mad it took her so long. I fucked an elf last night and strawberry shortcake the night before!
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
Text me all the things you want us to do this summer. So far, I have Kegstand written down
That moment when your whole family facetimed you just moments before you threw up all over the entire living room
Randomize
