Do you think Patty Mayonase ever went down on Doug?
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
Laying on my kitchen floor and the lights just got brighter... I just died or there was a power surge. Based on the amount of booze I drink both are possible.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I just found out via Facebook that my old dorm room is now the free condom distribution room on campus...IT'S LIKE THE UNIVERSE KNOWS!
On duty sugar tits. A Marine never abandons his post to take nudi pics.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I think I need a restraining order. I had 15 "selfies" of him on my camera roll......my phone has a lock code on it.
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
Randomize
