Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
I saw a seagull swallow a hot-dog whole today, it reminded me of you.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
I don't care what anyone says I want strippers at my funeral.
Tonight was the second time that I've pretended like English was my 2nd language to avoid conversation w a creeper.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
I sent him pictures of just me in my thong and he replied "you're so sweet, you make me feel special <3".... Oh.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Bring me that man meat
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
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