she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
just woke up with an anonymous loaf of bred in my bed and a piece in my mouth. this says alot about my life.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
For future reference, even the most well-intentioned game of whiskey pong is a terrible idea.
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
He's moaning and crying and coughing up something audibly liquid. I can't live in this house any more.
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
It's the first weekend of the school year and I'm already selling stuff for booze. Need a microwave?
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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