literally had 100 drinks last night.
How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Out of beer. Salsa pong. Never again.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
I seriously doubt this is the first time pumpkin pie has led to a booty call.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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