Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
The fact that me being able to walk down stairs is an accomplishment in my books pretty much explains how I am
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Remind me to tell you all about the topless girl on the street who attempted to taze me.
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
Woah don't start going all boyfriend on me now, you're here for one thing and one thing only and that's sex, hot shameless sex.
i may have just googled 'is philly rioting right now'
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
I just found a ladybug shell in my underwear. What was I doing last night?
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