We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
apparently the 911 operator took drunk dialing waaayy too seriously
they made me velveta mac and cheese and fish. I wanna stay here the rest of my life
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
I just made cupcakes.... Vodka icing. Results in the morning.
it wasn't a total waste of time; I mean how often do you get to play scotch pong?
.....fair enough
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
