Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
hey your mom heard me say to her " That right your not going to Shit right for a month"
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
Did your surprise acid trip turn out well?
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
When's the last time you had sex near some ducks?
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
So... Sorry we took your wife to the strip club last night... And sorry we bought her that lap dance... I think you're getting closer to your dream of a threesome, though.
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