So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
i just threw up repeatedly on the entire entire walk down A1A to the pizza place....then on the way back slipped and fell in it
I cannot believe you needed a note to remind yourself to ask me about the fourteen sleeping Mexicans.
jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I hope so. I just start to question my lifestyle when i pee on coffee tables
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I'll be in my room with a breakfast burrito at 2:30. It's up to you...
Delivery driver perk #327: I just paid for part of the security deposit on my new place in pizza. This oughta be a fun renting experience.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
I definitely don't have enough experience with hookers to be in this group text anymore.
FUCK YOU IM DRINKING WINE FROM A BOX
You okay there or need a ride? Maybe a straw for your box
Maybe a straw...
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