The next morning she woke up and asked who I was and where she was.
everything was goin great until he pulled out his ed hardy lighter and smoked in my face like he was cool.
it's like you attract all the douchebags that nobody wants. people should thank you.
non applicator tampons are so hard to put in when your drunk. i fingered myself for 10 minutes and forgot what i was trying to do.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
My wedding band has saved me from at least four cases of herpes tonight.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
Finding an empty bathroom to shit on campus is like the quest for the fucking Holy Grail. Except with more stench and humiliation.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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