we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
he just kept repeating that I have nice areolas
We've been here for ten minutes. She told me I wasn't "Irish enough", licked my tits, and then sprinkled green glitter on them.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
So on a scale from 1-10 how gross is it that I used mortuary makeup on my own face?
He realized that I was watching deadliest catch while we were jerkin off on FaceTime.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
Would it be crossing a line if I told him that I now know his girlfriend has a huge mole on her left ass cheek?
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
TELL HER ABOUT THE GODDAMNED MOTHERFUCKING POTATOES
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Thus began an intricate shell game of nude cardigan photos
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
