Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
wore my lacy blue thong that says "hello there" across the front today for my gynecologist appointment. I live to make people uncomfortable
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Yeah. I've decided no relationship can survive me shoving my boobs in the guys face
Dont get mad at me, it takes two to tango
IT TAKES ONE TO EJACULATE INTO THE OTHER WITHOUT CONSENT, AND SPOILER ALERT, ITS THE ONE WITH A SCROTUM FULL OF SEMEN.
I just baptized the girl next to me. LONG LIVE THE CHURCH OF VODKA
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
That's the kind of activity you can only get away with by wearing a lion codpiece
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
I just met his mom for the first time with a hang over. Then we went to watch his 8 year old cousin get baptized. Apparently his family loves me. I should drink more often.
Randomize
