ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
You do realize that you tried to eat the neighbors cat because the dominos guy was 5 minutes late. You would have succeeded if we didnt stop you.
It was fun until the stripper told me it was her first day and started crying.
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
I'm glad you don't care about kids. That's one of your better qualities.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
