Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
I should have questioned it early on when they said bring beer and chocolate syrup
The worst thing about it is now I have to find someone else to fuck in the library.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
You force fed me pizza in bed last night. That was fun
Also, beer. Big fan.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
They live across the street from a school baseball field so they have porter potties across the street and let's just say that I'm grateful they exist
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
How can you tell that you're blacked out ?
You can feel it in your nipples.
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