wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
You walked in on me taking a shit and told me to hit the bong
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
he wears New Balance sneakers on a regular basis, did you really expect the sex to be more than decent?
Still drunk on my morning "run" which has turned into a walk. Just burped fireball
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
