I am puke
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
i'm at the point now where i want him to say anything. even an apology for his boomerang-shaped penis would be nicer than no comment.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
i snuck out to taco bell in my hospital gown earlier
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
Who wakes up at 9 and says "let me send a pic of my dick to my ex gf"
I licked your asshole in confidence.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
Randomize
