I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Hey. Whatever time u wake up let me know Ur alive. I need my vegas partner... I don't think they let u take corpses on a plane.
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Dude you went around coming up behind people and whispering in their ears. I dont know what you said but they looked terrified when you left.
Why did you send me 12 pictures in a row of your expressionless face at 2:30 am?
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
there is something very satisfying about getting tacos after hours of sex.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Randomize
