You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
My bed smells like naked
Haha. At least it doesn't smell like herpes
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
she thought Martin Luther king was a president at one time. I love knowing I broke up with my ex and this is what he ends up dating.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Apparently today is power bottom appreciation day
Sorry I wasn't opportunistic about sucking your dick in an Uber last night
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Randomize
