This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
I'm pretty sure he jizzed in his pants, and no it wasn't even half as funny as that song.
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
i told them to call me paula dean as i was making all 10 for $10 boxes of pizza rolls in the microwave
new plan: i think the keg will fit in my purse.
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
I Can't even believe I threw all my pizza rolls at her, I mean not only did i ruin a good meal but now I dont have anymore
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
On a separate note, I just found out some condoms aren't vegan. Problem.
Hahahaha I can't wait for you to ask "wait. are there any animal by products in that?"
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
Bouncer came into the bathrooms to tell us the old one-person-per-stall rule, realised it was two girls banging, and left us to it. Lesbiperks.
We have hung out 5 times and only had sex 3 of those times. I'd call that friendship
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
