we're blogging at a bar
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
I just want him to make us coffee. And whack off into the sunset
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Adulthood is putting your bongs in the dishwasher because you're too lazy to clean them manually.
Are you ok dude?
Randomize
