That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
I have the worst wedgie. Seriously. Its horible. And there are people everywhere around me.
Slide your hand down the back of your pants and shift to the side slowly
...are you coming on to me?
Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Is it bad that John just came to my work to have sex with me bc I felt bad that he slept on his porch last night locked out and I missed all his calls?
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
We've been walking through the woods for two hours, he just keeps taking pictures. At least we'll remember this tomorrow.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
Apparently my hair turned out really good because I got my butthole licked by a stranger last night
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