Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
you ran down to the water at 3am and rolled in the sand and ran around screaming that you were the corn dog monster.
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
She failed the Charleston discretion test, although puking in her armpit was very innovative.
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
YOU DONT EAT A GIRL OUT AND THEN GO PUKE ASSHOLE
He fucked me for my Netflix login, I fucked him for his HBO login, and actually I think that's beautiful
I managed to convince her that the egg yolks were actually orange juice and she fell for it
Randomize
