I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
I vaguely remember telling people they were not trash cans
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
even your uterus rejects him.
apparently my uterus is the smartest part of my body.
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
I mean if she was naked in my room I would talk to her
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
Randomize
