I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
i can't understand anything he's saying. But he spells alcohol right everytime so i deciphered it.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Today I left one job interview, showed up randomly at his house for a midday bootycall then left right after to attend my second job interview. I got both jobs
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Hahahaha yep. You were picking up the credit card machine and singing to it in Spanish.
Uber driver offered to have sex with me since I went home solo. - rock bottom
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
Randomize
