Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
Whats contracted in vegas does not stay in vegas....
i just saw an asian skipping down the street and it made me think of you
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
i ended up eating cold sauceless spaghetti out of the container in the fridge with my hands.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I woke up in my basement holding someone else's underwear and a bottle of mouthwash . I wish I could explain more than that but i can't remember ...
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
Randomize
