dude she wont stop talking about little people big world...she said my penis looked like zach roloff and took a picture with her phone?
Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
that was the first time i tried it. why is it all sticky? its like somebody threw a glue bottle at my face.
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
I don't know what he sees in her. All I see are horrible pancake nipples
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Although a guy bought me a shot of fireball last wknd and I told him he wouldn't even get half a handjob for that and walked away so don't tell me I don't have standards
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
Can I borrow your google glasses to make a sex tape?
This pedicure right now is the most physical I've been with a guy all month
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
i should probably stop doing things just because i think they’re funny. i’m not going to.
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