That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
its 9am and we're in an escalade. I have no shoes and my dress is on backwards. I feel like we're the morning after a rap video
vegan vag taste different. and not a good different
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
Barack Obama mentioned plan B and suddenly this address seems a lot more personal
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Just resonded to a booty call with "how much effort is required on my part?" I think I've finally reached the point of smoking too much pot
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
Nothing kills the mood quicker than kneeing him in the face during sex
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
Randomize
