Just accidentally pinched my dick between two 50 pound dumbbells while doing shoulder shrugs. God hates me.
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
I cried at the bouncer while saying I wished he was my father... They had no idea what to do with me.
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
Not only did my parents pick me up from his hotel room in the morning, but he also came outside and had a casual little chat with my dad through the driver's side windrow.
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
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