god I wish I could record you sometimes, you're so neurotic
I told her I was team Edward. I haven't gotten laid that easy since I told your sister that I had cancer
My birth control alarm just woke me up from my dream where I was pregnant. Thank god.
it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
All I remember about walking back home was that I maced my shadow.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
You said that you were drinking out of a pan, and then went on to apologise to 'Jesus and all the other guys' for drinking on a Sunday.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
And if you ever tell anyone that I have emotions ill kill you
Mom called last night while I was at the bar and asked where I was. I told her I was on the highway to the danger zone while the guys were humming the top gun theme.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
