I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
We're sending your burrito through the mail slot.
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
But, if I start dating you brother, I can't talk to you about the sex anymore!! Like... Can we talk about it anonymously?! I just won't use his name.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
When do you think the murder is going to happen in this Lifetime movie of ours?
Randomize
