Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
I tried to tell him it was only 2:00, but he said since it was 5:00 in New York, it was perfectly acceptable. He then put on a Blues Brothers hat and a pair of wayfarers and left. I expect him home in a few hours with a police escort.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
I'm pretty sure that when my parents bought me those savings bonds they thought it would go towards something useful like tuition. Not your bail.
I told you I'd buy you lunch.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
what's your room number? I've never been there sober...
Red Alert: She has 3 cats, a parrot, and 2 rats. Initiate Protocol Zero and rendezvous at Checkpoint Bravo for debriefing
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
Randomize
