im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
We may not see eye-to-eye on much, but I'm definitely willing to let you see eye-to-vagina again.
Sex should not remind me of how baby birds get fed
Found the cure to anxiety attacks.
An orgasm
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I think it might be the guy sitting next to me. I've concluded he HAS to be smuggling insane amounts of onions in his wardrobe to smell like that
Randomize
