with your own penis?
AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
The lawn was on fire, but I fixed it.
I told the girl in his bed not to bleed on his sheets like the last one.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
You know you stopped at a liquor store to prepare for a 12-year-old's birthday party, right?
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Also I want everyone to be drunk at my funeral. Instead of wearing black just blackout. That way everyone can celebrate how fun I was
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
I'm basically cruising around listening to 90's gangsta rap with my meatball sub telling people to go fuck themselves
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Randomize
