I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
dude, when you're random girl from last night came down the stairs this morning she fell all the way down. I laughed. She just walked out. I hope shes ok. Tell her I give her a 10 for that landing though.
I will start puting down the plastic for the vom in our love chamber. If you want to be something or someone else for the night feel free. The theme is shit show.
I'm there.
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Just to update you. I am dead. So your probably gonna have to find a new roommate
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I haven't reeked of cheap beer and poor decisions in months. I officially hate adult life.
I also just stashed a half dozen bobby pins in my bra.... So when you take it off later, consider yourself warned
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
Randomize
