STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
His fridge was full of blocks of pepperjack cheese, and his pantry was stocked with huge jars of jellybeans. Even if I'd been drunk, I don't think I could've made that up.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I told him that he was essentially a very life-like dildo with a person attached so he needed to stop having feelings because it was getting annoying. He agreed.
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Just saw a rice crispy commercial and got emotional. I need to go home.
I'm beginning a new chapter of my life in which our fridge will always be stocked with jello shots. I'm excited to embark down this road to fruity, semi-solid alcoholism.
Preface: Im drunk. But i think id make a good assasin. That is all.
Lots of tissues. Maybe pizza. Only time will tell. The stages of political grief.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
