I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
my roomate judo was messing around with a girl who recently had a kid, when he was sucking her tits milk came out lmao
I feel like if you stuck me in a room with all my old toys it'd be the best high ever.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
It could happen. I haven't creeped the rest of the guest list yet.
Just creeped. Everyone is a passable 7. Orgy is a go!
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
But if you move out who will get drunk with me on the roof and yell at boys?!?
I think the moment she woke up butt naked on a mattress with her phone still on her face was the point she knew last night was fucked up
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
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