there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Also I'd apologize for texting you flipping my shit about the science of hair growth while I was shrooming last night but we know each other better than that
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
Didn't realize he fucked me in a bed a dog is always in until my face swelled two sizes and I had hives all over my body. This is God's way of punishing me for having amazing sex.
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Randomize
