nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
i just woke up in the woods behind my house in handcuffs and a dan marino jersey ive never seen before
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
But I'll just tell people it was a bar fight... Sounds a lot better than "well I was drunk and alone and eating Special K naked in my bed"
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Sunday mornings are confusing. Like. I can't decide if I want to go for a run or start drinking
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
just stepped out my front door and let the wind dry my naked body because I was too lazy to go search for a clean towel that may not even exist. I could live like this forever
God. Spice Girls is now grocery store demographic. Kill me.
Randomize
